Monkey Business

Here's DLR's take on the monkey tragedy.

Mr. 5&K: WTF is up with these whyte folks and their crazy azz pets? Yall hear about the pet monkey that mauled this lady's friend the other day?

Lu: Ha, yeah only caught snippets of the story (yeah I said snippets). Heard that the chimp went off like shyt. Said they even stabbed the joint with a kitchen knife and he still kept biting. What happened at the end?

Mr. 5&K: The owner stabbed him several times AND hit his azz with a shovel and he STILL kept mauling the lady. Ended up biting off both her hands and somebody said her face as well. Then the bamma went at the police. They shot him in the chest and killed him.

JRod: The 911 call was horrific. She was like, "He's biting her face off. Ahhhhh!!!!" LMAOOOOO. (I know I'm going to h3ll for that, but that shyt was funny. Lesson to my fair skinned people...Don't let wild animals live with you. They're wild and will bite your phuckin' face off, LMAO).

Mr. 5&K: Something like that should have some type collar on at all times with enough voltage to put it down immediately, if it ever kirked out. Drunk azz monkey should have never been that smart in the first place

KPax: After the cop shot him he still was going crazy. Sd he finally went back in his cage in the house and died.

JRod: That bytch obviously never saw that movie Monkey Shines when the monkey was trying to kill that man in the wheelchair, LOL. I don't phuck with no monkeys. They said they fed his azz filet mignon, lobster, and ice cream. That mofo was fat as shyt. Also said he brushed his teeth, dressed himself, and surfed the Internet. LMAO. That monkey was probably phuckin' that woman. Must be some love triangle shyt, LOL.

Mr. 5&K: *in tears over here*......LMAO!
This nukka ain't right. Can you imagine though......you pull up and get out the car and all of a sudden this big azz monkey is bearing down on you. Woulda side stepped that joint and two pieced the shyt out of him.

Lu: Ha, would have side stepped and ran like hell toward some other people thinking he may go for them instead.

Mr. 5&K: LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
I know right.....I'm lying. I would have yelled out "OH SHYT" and tried to hit that bamma with a Barry Sanders juke like shyt......lol